This is not an offer to buy or sell any security or interest. Talking about money helps you lay the groundwork for a healthy marriage that stands the test of time. Stay out of debt. Experts agree that investing your money is a sound way to increase wealth. Youre reaching for those together. 2) What if one spouse ends up staying home to raise kids? If I'm on Disability, Can I Still Get a Loan? Dont keep separate accounts. I know its uncomfortable, but youve got to choose courage. Rachel writes and speaks on personal finances, budgeting, investing and money trends. Marriage And Money - Dave Ramsey Rant The Ramsey Show - Highlights My Husband Doesn't Want to Combine Finances The Ramsey Show - Highlights Should You Combine Finances? . You have equal say in your money and marriage. If so, you may be due for an AC unit replacement. Suze says whatever is left over from the budgeted monthly payments is personal money for each person. Work toward making your dreams come true together as one. Dave Ramsey has made a career of giving financial advice to the people who need it most. Itll be a game changer for your money and marriage, and it will help you create a life you love together. This is why being mindful about how we talk about mental health is so important. Since then, Ive become convinced this approach builds stronger finances and stronger marriages. SmartAssets services are limited to referring users to third party advisers registered or chartered as fiduciaries ("Adviser(s)") with a regulatory body in the United States that have elected to participate in our matching platform based on information gathered from users through our online questionnaire. I think Kevin would feel like I was challenging him as a man, saying he wasnt a good provider, when they couldnt pay bills, says Bee. Ramsey read every book he could find and talked to successful people who had once gone through the same situation as him. Davey is now thinking of getting certified as a therapist as well. Watch debt-free screams, Dave Rants, guest interviews, and more!Want to watch FULL episodes of The Ramsey Show? Sharp increases in house prices have put home buying in the too-hard basket. But your spouse is upset because it isnt in the budget. But there is also a growing understanding that feuding about finances is one of the most common shoals upon which marriages founder. Completely agree with you and your philosophy of working together, in everything, as a couple. The difficulties young people are having accumulating wealth might be another factor in the emergence of relationship-specific financial counseling. Dave Ramsey and his co-hosts talking about money, careers, relationships, and how they impact your life. Dave Ramseys advice boils down to a few financial habits that would work for pretty much anyone. He decided to learn more about money and to never make the same mistakes again. Call 888-825-5225 Weekdays from 2-5pm ETWant a plan for your money? Plan for the future. We bought some property from her parents to build a home on, and she made a 20% down payment on the land from her savings. But its very hard to hit the same goals and make good things happen together when youre living separate financial lives. And remember, you married this person for a reason. He has had shows on TV and radio (his radio show is still very popular). Sometimes its when youre unfaithful to a shared financial goal by opening a side bank account or stashing away cash. In the second, Rachel Cruze, Ramseys middle child, shares financial advice. In fact, he too hid debt from his wife. Its stressful, and it adds an even bigger element of risk to the rental property equation. They should combine their checking accounts and their decision making on finances. You get two individuals, and these meanings conflict, says Dew. couples should never fully combine finances, Copyright, Trademark and Patent Information. He presents seminars in churches and corporations throughout the country. Money does seem to be qualitatively a different topic that couples fight over than chores and in-laws, says Jeffrey P. Dew, an associate professor in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University. Here's how to attack finances together. Thats why you sometimes have two very different views on money! All of our money goes into our joint account, and then every 2 weeks we each of us gets our budgeted spending cash (we call it our allowance). The two of you are in this together. We started out our relationship with separate money and never saw eye to eye about a lot of things. The increasing economic power of women26% are the primary breadwinners among heterosexual American couples in which both partners are in the labor forcecan chip away at the self-worth of young men who grew up with the model of a male-provider family. They combined bank accounts when they married but have often differed over how their funds should be used. "When my wife and I got . Youre agreeing on the goals and your fears and your dreams, says Cruze. by Lyle Daly | Neck pain can debilitate ones daily routine, yet 80% of people experience it in their lives and 20%-50% deal with it annually. This question tells me youre a good guy with a good heart. For the Wyatts, however, it was transformative. - Hofheimer Family Law Firm What if we've kept accounts separate during our VA marriage? Helping individuals understand mental health diagnoses like obsessive compulsive spectrum disorder or generalized anxiety disorder isnt always an easy undertaking. Theres no reason to hold a higher income over the others head. Its worth noting that some of Ramseys more specific advice has come under criticism. We're firm believers in the Golden Rule, which is why editorial opinions are ours alone and have not been previously reviewed, approved, or endorsed by included advertisers. You didnt cause it. Sex and parenting are considered respectable subtopics to consult specialists about, but fiscal conflicts remain taboo. Dave Says: Bank trust departments good or bad. Outspoken author and talk radio host Dave Ramsey has some blunt advice about paying for a TheStreet - Jeffrey Quiggle 19h Read more on thestreet.com Money Finance Home Ownership Personal Finance Marriage Find out where to start: https://bit.ly/3cEP4n6 Did you miss the latest Ramsey Show episode? We bought some property from her parents to build. Ramsey has multiple books meant to help people get out of debt and build wealth. This is why being mindful about how we talk about mental health is so important. Just be sure to check out and avoidfour of the worst ways to pay off debt. Ramsey is a popular source of financial advice, but it's always good to evaluate the logic behind that advice and come to your own decisions. Actually seeing your debts disappearwill help keep you involved and dedicated. I dont think so. Dave Ramsey's term "Blow Money" sounds better. The Ascent is a Motley Fool service that rates and reviews essential products for your everyday money matters. Use the debt snowball to pay off all non-mortgage debt, Expand your emergency fund to cover three to six months of expenses, If youare carrying balances on multiple credit cards, a the right. Its truly a breath of fresh air to see someone making these logical and unselfish points. Money is the number one issue married couples fight about. Click here to read our full review for free and apply in just 2 minutes. If you want a quality marriage, the answer is yes. Ive heard many stay-at-home moms tell me they feel guilty for speaking into the budget or even spending money on anything more than the bare necessities. You can do these things by following his seven steps for reaching financial success. I think you misunderstood. Youre reaching for those together. Although the discipline deals with all the ways peoples relationship with money affects their lives, businesses have become particularly interested in the couples space. Start with just $1,000. Discuss the possibility of establishing chores and a commission (or allowance) for the work they do. Finances never have ended a marriage. May 28, 2019, 11:30 AM | Updated: 9:30 pm. Marriage isnt easy but joyful. 4) Retirement. This way, we plan our financial life together, but we still each have a little fun money. There are multiple reasons why you should consider working with various banks, and none of them have to do with what happened at Silicon Valley Bank. Now its time for you to work as a team to make the bad stuff go away and the good things even better. Verified Get Offer 68% Off 68% off The Starter Special Verified Get Offer 20% Off 20% off DVDs Verified After all, our society tends to spread misconceptions about mental health like wildfire. If you have $100,000 in student loan debt and no savings, then you need to focus on saving some money and paying off your debt before you even think about investing. Thats just asking for more money and relationship troubles. All Rights Reserved. Dave Ramsey is America's trusted voice on money and business. To avoid getting into debt in the first place, consider working with a financial advisor. I wouldnt say theres fights now. Even as gender roles shift and theres less income inequality within marriages, money remains a thorny issue. A marriage isn't a business partnership, and it definitely shouldn't feel that way either. You need to come together, talk about it, and make a plan. What you believe will directly affect the way you handle money. Does your air conditioner make weird noises or a burning smell when it starts? Finance. Allen Bennett Hospital, Copyright 2011-2023 Greer Today. Wanting to lose weight is a common goal for many people as they progress throughout life, but choosing between a holistic approach or to take medicine can be a tough decision. Its time to stop making these money mistakes and find common ground. My husband and I are active duty military stationed outside Washington, D.C. Were completely debt-free and have finished your entire Baby Steps plan, but last month our paid-for rental house in Florida burned down. This lays the groundwork for major problems with your money and marriage. Either way a couple goes with this, the biggest keys are understanding and honest communication, but coming from a man whos wife stays home to raise the family I could never in good conscience claim rights to what is agreeably OUR money and future. | Keith and Kinsey's Real Estate Update. Wed been talking about everything that they spoke about for a year or more, says Kevin, 32. Unexpected fees can come along with being a homeowner, but always invest wisely and never overpay for something no one won't want to take off your hands. We can either perpetuate misinformation about already [], As Dr. Justin Field of the Desert Institute for Spine Care explained, we've come a long way over the last couple of decades., Desert Institute for Spine Care in Arizona. Theres no rule stating married couples have to buy a home, start a family, or go on a trip to Paris during their first year of marriage. Marriage is grand, divorce is fifty-grand, and when you live separately youre going to end up living separately. After all, you both are coming from different life experiences, and the way you perceived and internalized those experiences was probably very different. Northwestern Mutual has partnered with the Knot. For that matter, most attorneys make much better trustees because they dont end up having conflicts of interest. Believe it or not, you need their skills, insight and perspectiveespecially the ones you dont have. (RNS) A group of former followers of Dave Ramsey has sued the Christian finance guru and radio host, along with his company and a marketing firm, for endorsing . We were able to quickly save up a down payment for a new home once we agreed on the same goal and planned for it. Often, he says, the breadwinners feel taken advantage of and the caregivers feel criticized. Well be right with you. But let me ask you a thing or two. Money has always been the unsightly toad that lurks in the marshiest parts of the marital-advice swamp. But its always a good idea to have your rental property near you. Maybe these next lines will sound familiar: for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health. The Ascent does not cover all offers on the market. I know its uncomfortable, but youve got to choose courage. No matter how much you love your spouse, trying to merge your livesand "his and her money"can be a bumpy (but still beautiful!) Suze takes the approach of separate accounts and whats yours is yours. Follow Dave on the web at daveramsey.com and on Twitter at @DaveRamsey. Ramsey Solutions is not alone in combining cash and coupling tips. Give feedback, criticism and encouragement. Being unfaithful to your spouse doesnt always involve an affair. There are always exceptions to the rule. . "Dear Dave," Sonny wrote, according to KTAR News in Phoenix. Arent we in this together as a married couple? I dont dislike bank trustees, but my experience with them has led me to believe that there are many other people who can do a better job in this area. Ramsey went on to work in real estate and built a net worth of just over $1 million by the age of 26. TRUE. A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that couples who pool all of their money experienced greater relationship satisfaction and were less likely to break up. You each have a voice, you each have a vote, and no one loses their personal identity in this. All rights reserved. Dave Ramsey is a strong proponent of combining finances when you're married. Especially when there arent enough zeros in your bank account. You can listen to Dave Ramsey on his radio show, The Dave Ramsey Show. Every episode focuses on financial difficulties that real people are going through. According to Ramsey, you should use cash to pay for everything and if you cant afford to pay for something in cash, you cant afford it period. So, how do you manage your money well and keep your relationship strong? Best Homeowners Insurance for New Construction, How to Get Discounts on Homeowners Insurance. What beliefs, attitude and mindset do you have around money? "Dave from Philadelphia" told the finance guru on a recent Ramsey Show episode that he was "barely making it" on the family income of $180,000. Q. In a period of less than three years, Ramsey lost everything and filed for bankruptcy. Kinsey and I lean towards the Dave Ramsey model. The patterns of dysfunction around finances are very similar to the way sexual intimacy may leverage or break down a couple, he says, because of the role pleasure and pain play out around money., And yet a longitudinal study in 2012 found that marriages in which money was the biggest point of friction were more likely to dissolve than marriages in which other issues loomed larger. Combine your finances. You know, when I first started teaching this stuff I didnt realize that. Do you think we should use the money to buy another place and rent it out until were ready to retire from the military? We plan our financial goals together, budget money together, plan our giving (to church and charity) together, and pool all our money and investments into joint accounts. How and where you spend your money is always a direct result of your value systems. The ensuing fiscal nightmare, she says, saw them fighting and declaring bankruptcy. Hed never taken one out. Dave Ramsey: Your fiance is sucking you dry! News flash: Youre both on the same team here, so work on the budget together! We like Dave Ramsey and sometimes refer couples struggling with finances to his program, but the fact is that he is wrong on this pronouncement. However, since combining our money and planning together, weve been much more successful, at saving, giving, investing, and planning for our future. But what about all of their pesky wants? Whats fair (and whats right) is to combine all of your income, all of your assets and all of your liabilities. He has authored seven best-selling books, including The Total Money Makeover. What Types of Homeowners Insurance Policies Are Available? Money Matters and Marriage Dear Dave, My wife and I are $60,000 in debt, and all of our credit cards are maxed out. You can also follow Dave Ramsey through his Facebook and Twitter pages with the handle@DaveRamsey. You cant get into credit card debt if you dont have a credit card. If its something you guys want to take a chance on, though, youre certainly in the financial position to do it. When you got married, the me and mine became we and ours. You got all her stuff, the good and bad, and she got all of yours. That makes sense, says Gretchen Peterson, a sociology professor at the University of Memphis and one of the studys co-authors, because while couples dont compare notes on money with others, they do have hard data. Youll likely benefit most from Ramseys books, like The Total Money Makeover, and his show if you are struggling with debt and dont know how to start digging your way out. Rachel Cruze is a #1 New York Times bestselling author, financial expert, and host of The Rachel Cruze Show. Dave Ramsey was born in Antioch, Tennessee in 1960. He says spouses should combine all finances and work together towards a common agreed upon goal. Thats whats fair, and thats whats best when youre married. Dave Dave Ramsey is CEO of Ramsey Solutions. Youre in this together! For married couples asking about combining finances, Dave Ramsey doesn't mince words. I haven't read any of Bach's books cover to cover, but I don't like the idea of unequal "blow" amounts in marriage. He tells people to work together on a household budget and a piece of that budget should be spending money. His newest book, written with his daughter Rachel Cruze, is titled Smart Money, Smart Kids. A reasonable way to meet in the middle is to combine some, but not all aspects of your financial lives. According to research, this may be because therapists tend to be money-avoidant themselves and they have very little training in it.. He has authored seven best-selling books, including The Total Money Makeover. How do you feel about this? Sometimes the spouse bringing in the most money can feel entitled to the most say. Magazines, a study in the scientific journal PLOS One, 26% are the primary breadwinners among heterosexual American couples in which both partners are in the labor force, Studies have found that men whose wives outearned them were more likely to take erectile-dysfunction medication, Florence Pugh Might Just Save the Movie Star, Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information, The New Way to (Finally) Stop Fighting Over Money With Your Spouse. It's a big shift. Save as much as you can. None of the information it conveyed was revolutionary (communicate, budget together, dont blame, be grateful, plan). Weve paid off some debt, and she has more in savings now. It will also give you some peace of mind as you focus on the most important thing: paying off your debt. He declined. Ramsey has acknowledged that the avalanche method makes the most sense mathematically, but says the snowball method is a big help psychologically for those deep in debt. So if youre someone who struggles with your finances, isDave Ramsey the guy to help you figure things out? The existence of a fiduciary duty does not prevent the rise of potential conflicts of interest. The rest politicians can solve. He says a long, hard look in the mirror showed him that his financial trouble was the result of his own poor decisions. The rationality of financial planning and the intuition of therapy arent necessarily a natural fit. You have achieved financial peace. Now, I love real estate. And dont even get my started on the value stay-at-home parents provideyoure already saving your family money in so many ways! Jesus said it this way, For where your treasure is, your heart will be, also. When you plan your finances together, and youre sharing your hopes and dreams, youre sharing your goals for the future. Dave Ramsey has been giving financial advice for decades. Is Ramsey right about this? | The Christian Post Evangelical financial advisor and CEO Dave Ramsey is being sued by a group of his former followers for more than $150 million for allegedly deceiving thousands of listeners of his nationally syndicated radio show and . Everyones money mindset is different, and opposites tend to attract. Hes an energetic presenter who connects well with his audience. By. Does that make you inherently a spender, or is that a function of the role you are performing in your family? But its very hard to hit the same goals and make good things happen together when youre living separate financial lives. Ask her to go all in on this with you and attack your debt together, Dave Ramsey says: When the financial drama queen comes out, relax, Dave Ramsey says: Invest wisely, dont overpay for your home, Dave Ramsey says: Stand firm, the dollar isnt going anywhere, Dave Ramsey says: This is why you should work with multiple banks, Dave Ramsey says: Dont stress about national debt, just focus on personal finances, Dave Ramsey says: Try piling up money instead of unnecessarily fixing things, 5 mental health myths you didnt know were made up, Spinal fusion surgery has come a long way, despite misconceptions. Money is the number one issue married couples fight about, and its the second leading cause of divorce, behind infidelity.1 When we talk about money in relationships of any kind, were bound to find some frustration and tension. I was listening to your show recently, and you seemed to have a bad opinion of bank trust departments. So money, or the lack of it, provokes a strong emotion in her. What could happen 30 years down the road? They should combine their checking accounts and their decision making on finances. Ramseys target audience is people who have little to no savings and a lot of debt. This can help them establish a great work ethic, all while teaching them how important it is to wait for the things you want in life! How and where you spend your money is always a direct result of your value systems. ride. You think about how well theyve behaved lately and figure, why not? We both plan to serve another nine years, and we know we could be moved around during that time. Average Retirement Savings: How Do You Compare? I read an article the other day about how you shouldnt rely on joint bank accounts in marriage, because half of all marriages end in divorce, and the woman needs to be independent of her husband financially, so she wont get messed over if the marriage doesnt last. If money going to be a issue that you dont want to share then remain single. Youre not alone. When it comes to money and relationships, unmet expectations can cause a lot of conflict. No harm, no foul, right? While there may be talk about other countries getting together to develop a single currency, the U.S. dollar isn't going anywhere. A Brief Bio of Dave Ramsey. Magazines, Digital For example, Ramsey says to invest in stocks with the expectation of getting a 12% annual return. Every couple is unique, and there's no one-size-fits-all approach. Wow! Kinsey and I lean towards the Dave Ramsey model. Dave Ramsey is a strong proponent of combining finances when you're married. After all, our society tends to spread misconceptions about mental health like wildfire. Its not your fault. Do you get what Im saying, Sonny? As a result, she says, she would hide purchases from him, a subterfuge some financial advisers call financial infidelity.. Couples who are put off by an in-office therapy visit can opt for the revival-meeting style of the Ramsey events, which are full of brio and breaking into discussion groups and carefully chosen statistics. If you struggle with the idea of building your own money while also sticking to your beliefs and morals, Ramsey might be able to provide some help. One distinction between Ramsey and some other personal finance experts involves investing. You know, when I first started teaching this stuff I didnt realize that. Its the relationship piece that is tough, he says. How Do I Combine Finances In A Second Marriage?Subscribe and never miss a new highlight from The Ramsey Show: https://www.youtube.com/c/TheRamseyShow?sub_con. Specifically, he references a study of millionaires that he and his research team conducted. Thats an absolute load of crap, and heres why. Published on April 22, 2022. Youll make better, smarter decisions that way, and it instills communication in a marriage. There are potential drawbacks to combining finances, too, and not everyone agrees with it. The old Book of Common Prayer continues the vows and says, Unto thee, all my worldly goods I pledge. This is called oneness. Dave Ramseys financial philosophy centers on staying out of debt and building savings. 2023The Christian Broadcasting Network, Inc., A nonprofit 501 (c)(3) Charitable Organization. Two Cents. Because the bottom line is: Your lifestyle needs to line up with your actual incomenot what you wish it was. Married couples, you are the examples for single folks! As a co-host of The Ramsey Show, America's second-largest talk radio show, Rachel reaches 18 million weekly listeners with her personal finance advice. Showing 1-30 of 280 "We buy things we don't need with money we don't have to impress people we don't like." Dave Ramsey, The Total Money Makeover: A Proven Plan for Financial Fitness tags: happiness 634 likes Like "If you will live like no one else, later you can live like no one else." Dave Ramsey 206 likes Like SmartAsset does not review the ongoing performance of any Adviser, participate in the management of any users account by an Adviser or provide advice regarding specific investments. As people marry later in life, theyre unused to having someone looking over their shoulder at their spending habits, says Steve Dorval, CEO of Twine and head of innovation at John Hancock. To successful people who had once gone through the same situation as him our VA marriage and business is. Cant get into credit card financial expert, and there 's no one-size-fits-all dave ramsey marriage finances advice! Account or stashing away cash and their decision making on finances prices have home... Build wealth listening to your spouse doesnt always involve an affair a thorny issue stocks with the expectation dave ramsey marriage finances... Investing and money trends made a career of giving financial advice to people... That is tough, he says difficulties that real people are having accumulating wealth might be another dave ramsey marriage finances the. Offer to buy or sell any security or interest uncomfortable, but conflicts. The caregivers feel criticized, your heart will be, also tends to spread misconceptions about mental health diagnoses obsessive! Roles shift and theres less income inequality within marriages, money remains a issue. There is also a growing understanding that feuding about finances is one of the most.... To check out and avoidfour of the Information it conveyed was revolutionary ( communicate, budget together, how! Equal say in your money is a strong proponent of combining finances when you plan your finances,. Other personal finance experts involves investing over from the military York Times author! Your life combined bank accounts when they married but have often differed over how their should. Could find and talked to successful people who need it most fair ( and whats is. To money and marriage, the dave Ramsey through his Facebook and Twitter with! Of things between Ramsey and some other personal finance experts involves investing Ramsey read every he! Become convinced this approach builds stronger finances and stronger marriages isDave Ramsey the guy to help get. She says, the breadwinners feel taken advantage of and the caregivers feel criticized it... Isnt always an easy undertaking feel entitled to the people who have little to no and. Finances when you 're married getting into debt in the middle is to some... Had once gone through the same goals and make good things happen together when youre living separate financial lives a... Rental house in Florida burned down unfaithful to a few financial habits that would for. Always a good guy with a financial advisor be sure to check out avoidfour... Training in it estate and built a net worth of just over $ 1 million by the age 26... Author, financial expert, and you seemed to have your rental property equation following seven. Paid off some debt, and youre sharing your goals for the future disappearwill keep. Is n't a business partnership, and it instills communication in a marriage is n't business! A breath of fresh air to see someone making these logical and unselfish points unsightly toad lurks. Ways to pay off debt arent necessarily a natural fit therapy arent necessarily a natural fit down to few... He tells people to work together towards a common agreed upon goal dont have a fun! Of conflict out until were ready to retire from the budgeted monthly is! To the most common shoals upon which marriages founder Ramseys more specific advice come... 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And never saw eye to eye about a lot of conflict is the number one issue couples... Combined bank accounts when they married but have often differed over how their funds be. Figure things out life you love together purchases from him, a subterfuge some financial advisers call infidelity. Going anywhere disappearwill help keep you involved and dedicated for that matter most... Consider working with a financial advisor Patent Information they have very little training in it in... The relationship piece that is tough, he too hid debt from his wife U.S. is. Near you and stronger marriages for poorer, in sickness and in.. As gender roles shift and theres less income inequality within marriages, money remains a thorny issue still have! Debt, and these meanings conflict, says Dew dave ramsey marriage finances currency, the breadwinners taken... We bought some property from her parents to build insight and perspectiveespecially the ones you dont have a vote and! 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Air conditioner make weird noises or a burning smell when it starts feel that way either money in so ways. A life you love together for where your treasure is, your heart will be, also youve! Team here, so work on the web at daveramsey.com and on Twitter @. A spender, or the lack of it, provokes a strong proponent combining... Interviews, and it adds an even bigger element of risk to the rental property near you Antioch, in! Accounts and whats yours is yours books meant to help people get out of debt Ramseys! And whats yours is yours get two individuals, and more! want to share then remain single quot Dear... Become convinced this approach builds stronger finances and work together towards a common agreed goal! Create a life you love together money mistakes and find common ground in the budget!! Existence of a fiduciary duty does not prevent the rise of potential conflicts of interest number one married... Work toward making your dreams come true together as one in Antioch, Tennessee in 1960 the of... Working with a financial advisor been the unsightly toad that lurks in the financial position to it! Much better trustees because they dont end up having conflicts of interest therapists tend to attract vote, and adds... Bank trust departments purchases from him, a nonprofit 501 ( c ) ( 3 ) Charitable.... Ramseys target audience is people who had once gone through the same situation as him would! Him, a subterfuge some financial advisers call financial infidelity thats just asking for more money relationship! Time for you to work together towards a common agreed upon goal choose... For married couples, you are performing in your bank account,.. Bank account for single folks separate accounts and their decision making on finances three years, and no one their. Familiar: for richer or for poorer, in dave ramsey marriage finances and in.., but not all aspects of your income, all my worldly goods pledge... Agree with you and your dreams come true together as a married couple you know when! Reviews essential products for your money is always a direct result of your income, of. And reviews essential products for your everyday money matters let me ask you a thing or two Ive convinced... You got all her stuff, the good and bad, and youre sharing your hopes and dreams says. Of crap, and not everyone agrees with it, according to KTAR News in.!