In my circle of friends, I am the cook, I know what it feels like. So no - when we were dating I did go out dancing quite a bit with my girlfriends - and of course we were hit on - but I never went home with anyone or to anyone other than my hubs. Having a "Guys" night. I did. I'm in the same situation. My husband likes to have a beer or two so he does go to the local dive bars with the guys after work. If he doesn't give you the reaction your after. I wouldn't put a gun I was cleaning up to my head and pull the trigger, even if I had already taken the bullets out of it. I do not drink but I go to have girl time and chat. We are individuals sharing the same goals in relationship. 10. 1. Just get him chipped like a spaniel at the vet so you can track him. Guy didnt wish me happy birthday am I wrong to be upset? It would be nice, thats why its called a relationship! Well, honestly, he only goes once every week-2 weeks. I really don't understand your answer, since when the hell does having fun mean not being into her? By We LIKE being home together. Its not in my personality to go to a bar alone.but I have gone out to the bar with some girlfriends and/or my SIL. I always get the excuse of the phone dying or it fell but yet I can see he is online on Facebook etc it's always the weekend that his battery has died when he's out I don't blame you for stressing I have this situation every weekend it's at the point where I've had enough. I think a lot of the nervousness comes from being worried about looking like a loner or a weirdo, but when you . Sorry if I'm completely out of line, it's J. that I've known so many people who've ruined their relationships over situations like this. Like I said before, lots of "casual meetings over drinks" have turned into affairs. If you've been using dating apps, you've probably encountered the frustrating phenomenon of potential matches saying "I'll get back to you" and then never following through. It premiered on TNT on July 12, 2010, and set a record as cable TV's most watched commercial-supported series launch. I can't trust him at all anymore he lies too much and he drunk all the time and he doesn't care about anything especially me and I also hate the fact that he says we are not together and I have a one month probation with him. Warning signs that your male partner is emotionally controlling you. Although it's good for your relationship for both your and your partner to do things without the other person, some of the specific things that they (or you) do alone can actually give you some insight into how they're feeling about the relationship. I have talked to too many girls and guys that bitterly recalled how one drink too many let their inhibitions lower enough that they got too huggy and hormones took over ending a relationship. LDR's are hard for both parties but your boyfreind sounds selfish and callous. Also, you've officially met a women who has no attraction whatsoever to other women!! It's not that we can't go out, we J. don't want to. Really though, putting him in a container is not going to keep him faithful. When he normally calls and then he doesn't is when he is out having fun. I know what it's like to love someone but know they aren't good for you. Do I end things? You have a good one it appears. I know I can trust him. I see people there I know, sometimes men, sometimes J. the servers. It's one thing for your girlfriend to go partying without you and another for her to go without even informing you. And my husband does not have a problem with it. If they're traveling for a friend or family member's bachelor or bachelorette party, for instance, you might not be invited, so leaving you behind doesn't mean that they're pulling away. But it is a sign he isn't that serious about you, and no, its not because he is too drunk or passed out. If it becomes a constant thing of going ot the bars all the time and it eats into your time with him, which is what my bf wants to do, then you may have something to worry about. It's kind of like the idea that Facebook ruins marriages. Im sorry for saying all this, its not that i dont trust you its just i'd prefer you to be honest with me and tell me the truth rather than putting up with everything, it would make it easier for the both of us and our relationship! Now sometimes I will go out ot a bar with some of my friends. If it doesn't work, try a new combination. I've lived in my little city since I was a teenager and I run into people EVERYwhere, so when I meet a friend I prefer a private location where I am better able to focus on them and our conversation. Now, like I said..if this changes, and he starts wanting to go more, like my bf is, and it cuts into your alone time..then yeah. Me and my boyfriend have talked about how we felt several times that we trust eachother so much to the point where if i dont talk to him for three days and i know hes at some crazy parties, i wont feel so worried and we trust each other so much that we both openly said that we could kiss other people if we wanted because truly we both know it wouldnt be real and that we love each other. If it isn't, then do what you want. I go out with my girlfriends, usually a dinner and drinks at the local dining place. At all. We agreed that going out alone with single people of the opposite sex is giving off the wrong impression that there might be something going on even though there isn'tso we don't do it. Maintaining organization for your electronics is very enjoyable. When you're young it's fun, but at 42 seems a bit pathetic. He texts you while he's out with the boys? I feel for you. It's okay to relax. He doesnt have time for meim so depressed and sad. But I would care if he went with women , J. like he would not like M. sitting drinking or dancing with men. wha NC for 4 months, ex didn't send me a text call or Anything for my Bday, tog She only talks, or texts in response to my call/text. If it becomes a constant thing of going ot the bars all the time and it eats into your time with him, which is what my bf wants to do, then you may have something to worry about. It seems like you really enjoy the attention so maybe your current relationship isn't up to par? He's due to come home in a couple of weeks but his dissapearing acts on the weekend just winds me up. since I'm an adult no one LETS or ALLOWS M. to do anything. You have to trust that he's just enjoying the company of his bros: drinking beers, talking smack and telling dirty jokes. As many said, you have to take your spouses comfort level into consideration. An adult, should know how to handle flattery and/or flirtations. I'm in need of help my boyfriend and I have been dating go a year and a bit he rang me telling me he going to a work do and that he would call in the morning I hqvent from him since I have his wallet and everything I'm so worried he might be cheating on me what do I do ?? I LOVE to dance!! I did indeed go and sit next to people I hadn't seen in months including some single men and proceeded to hug and be picked up by every guy I knew (oh how I love this bar, I'm 6 foot- so its rare to get the hug where people pick you up in the air and you get to feel like a girl lol) so anyway I do this every so often (usually once a month when my boyfriend has his Irish meeting, we'll take one car after dropping Emmy off with her dad, and I'll go here while he does his meeting) and usually my boyfriend will meet M. out or I will meet him out at some point in the night and we'll hang out with friends and have fun, but for a good portion I'm happily talking to whoever I want to, not gender biased or relationship status biased. Here's the thing he knows you are uncomfortable with it, doesn't push it with you, and you still gave him the green light. He would probably be pretty darn red too. Just calming say you will be "going out tonight/the weekend" for some fun with friends, he can enjoy himself with his. However if he was taking his single female intern out J. the two of them for drinksI would have a problem with thatif they go to lunch I really don't mind because it is usually because they are far away from the office on a site visit and go get something to eat. The problem is every time he's with his friends, he forgets about me completely and he doesn't want other to know that he is into a long distance relationship. My husband occasionally goes out with friends for a round of golf and then to a bar afterwards, I've never really given it much thought but I also trust him and am not worried. S H said it great, however i would add that the only way i go out is either with "the girls" or with my husband. good luck! "I guess it depends from one man to another. agirlwithnoname Like whatever, I love him so much that I could do anything for him but who am I to fool I can't stand this any longer. justagirl09January 22, 2012 in Trust and Relationships. If I wanted to go out to a bar with a bunch of girlfriends my husband would tell M. to have a good time and same for himthey guys go for a drink after work, sure join them (J. let M. know so I don't have dinner waiting). I guess it's all in how you carry yourself. They got married a year later. However, I understand about being concerned that he gets drunk, maybe has problems w/self-control.. Being married does not mean you are a Monk or not a part of the world. Yes I go out with out my husband.. if Im talking to anyone and they try to pick M. up using thier cheesy lines I let them know right away Im married. In recent years, the dating world has seen the rise of a new approach to romantic relationships known as "Goblin Mode." While telling him your problem just say I know its long distance which makes it hard for the both of us but I feel like I wanna talk to you more, and it worries me that you're always drinking and im afraid that there might be another girl out there. the next morning he said he was wasted with a bunch of his friendsand hes not the type to cheat on a girl, but who know what can happen when their drunk you know? (ok i'm being nice, i think it sends that message loud and clear, because men are horny pigs :) -said with love lol.) Most of the time I go out with my husband, but that is because we don't get very many opportunities to be out together and so I really want to be with him. he'll want me to stay in touch with him when I go outbut then once he goes out its MIA for hours and hours. I have also felt the "most women are bisexual" opinion to be not true in my circles. All about the power play. But he lets M. dance with who ever when we go out J. so he doesn't have to get out on the floor. Sure, you're at home Jonesn' about it, but that's ok you'll make it through, and he'll appreciate it. The bar is really not my husbands thing, but I go out with my friends without him and he is cool with it. I wouldn't meet a girl at a bar alone, either. I did have one guy ask M. to dinner after the annoying compliments you hear at such establishments and I replied that I had a boyfriend and he kept talking but kept asking how I was allowed to go out without my boyfriend. about 60-70 % of all females at Los Angeles bars are already taken and there with girlfriends or they are actually there with their boyfriends lmao. But not everyone would know the difference. But its called trust. I occasionally go to after work happy hour with a big group of co-workers. My bf WAS texting me from the bar, but that has tapered off. Don't make the same mistake I did. I don't understand how people have a problem with hanging out and not to flame here, at least to M., it screams insecurity. Do you really want a boyfriend who drinks heavily till he passes out? He might also be addicted to such acts, or have a compulsion to self-soothe' through intercourse. Lots of ladies (myself included) go out to meet friends without spouses to bars, and any bar is going to have single people in it. So, with that being said, if he wants to go out with his buddy once a week, its fine. It is trying to control each other because deep down you don't trust each other to behave in a party environment. But we can do that because we are older and have an understanding of what we want out of life. Hi dan,my girlfriend and I are together for 2 years now,and its the 3rd time that she has been to the club without me,she even says that she doesn't want any commitments now,where as I do,During these 2 years we haven't been to a club together,and I don't know what's going on behind my back,but she goes with her elder girl cousins to . 2023 ZIFF DAVIS CANADA, INC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. My husband and I are a like to where he has more female friends and I have more male friends that we are closest to, thankfully it doesn't bother either one of us. We will at a social event, but that is maybe once or twice a year. Track his every move know what he is doing all the time put a tracking chip on him shut up!! I think maybe you should think about having someone in your life who's a little unreliable like this. 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